The deal-breaker: Why my brother would NEVER move to Ecuador

Recently, one of my brothers who lives on the west side of Cleveland recently came to visit me on an extended trip to Ecuador.

Towards the end of his stay I asked him if he would ever consider living in Ecuador?

He said “no”.

Naturally, I asked “why?”

He said not being able to flush the toilet paper after wiping is a total dealbreaker for him.

Fair enough. Deal-breakers can be very simple things.

I agree that aspect of living here is annoying.

Yet all the while some gringos think it´s just a false belief and actually you can flush it, you´re wrong, in almost all places in Ecuador you really can´t or you could have major problems soon.

I know I´m going to get a million emails now saying why don-t I use a bidet. Man, whatever.

But I´d still choose Ecuador for the weather, costs of living, food, people, language, business opportunity and much more.

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How to avoid pricey roaming and keep in touch free with North America from Ecuador

Keeping in touch from abroad for extended periods of time can get costly.

Here’s how I’d do it.

I’d completely take your USA sim card out of your phone, or if not possible buy a second unlocked phone you can use when abroad and leave the USA one home.

Then, buy an Ecuadorian SIM to get you on the local network here and just go prepaid as you go.

And then to stay in touch with North America download the app I use and love …

TalkaTone.  

It’s free and instantly gives you a USA number people can call you at and the app also allows you to call USA and Canada numbers free as well. If you don’t answer you can activate the voicemail to email option also free.

It’s nice answering right from your cell phone and not a computer or phone attached to a router (like with Magic Jack).

Or having to keep up with annual fees like with Magic Jack or Vonage.

But you do have to be connected to the Internet, the faster the better for better call quality. I’ve found the call quality quite good though.

Once you have an Ecuadorian SIM you can buy DATA packages to stay connected just like you can buy minutes.

Now there’s no excuse to not stay connected.

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What happens when you lose your cedula (ID) in Ecuador?

“I’m such an idiot,” I thought earlier this week as I realized I lost my cedula or ID card everyone gets who is Ecuadorian or has a residency visa to live in Ecuador.

If Ecuadorians lose their cedula the process is simple and takes a few minutes to get another one, Civil Registry. $10. Done.

But when you are a FOREIGNER like me living in Ecuador, and lose your cedula, the process is WAY more difficult.

First, you have to go to your closest Ministry of Foreign Affairs (Ministerio de Relaciones Exteriores) and get a certificate called an EMPADRONAMIENTO. Don’t ask me what the h-ll that means.

To get that you have to get a slew of documents, they asked me for…

-Copies of passport and visa page in passport.
-Proof of health insurance.
-Fill in a form found here.
-Migratory Movements certificate (Movimiento Migratorio)
-Police report of lost cedula.  Which you can attain online here. 
-Proof of visa, in my case was the Ecuador validated college degree.

Then, you have to make an appointment online via the following site… problem is, I was told in Quito there are NO appointments open until February!  3 months!  So I made an appointment in Guayaquil for next week.

Once you attain the EMPADRONAMIENTO then you go to the Civil Registry (Registro Civil) and in a few hours you will have your new cedula with the same number as before so I’m told. Not that far yet.

For help with this process I suggest using my friend Abogado Oswaldo (TEL: 0967577326) who has an office right next to the Ministry of Foreign Relations in Quito on 6 de Diciembre and La Nina. For a few bucks he can get all mentioned documents above together in a nice folder for you to take on your appointment.

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How NOT to handle your money in Ecuador

“Dude, what are you doing? Put it away.” My Ecuadorian friend said to me near Plaza Foch nightlife district in Quito.

I had my wallet out in the street seeing how much money I had.

Until that point in my life growing up in the USA I never thought twice about pulling out my wallet.

While violent crime is not common in Ecuador, petty theft and home burglary is when compared to North America!

For instance:

CREDIT CARDS. Don’t use a credit card every where you go and for simple $8 charges.  Pay in cash.  ID theft is more common here, where people will take out a bad credit loan with your ID in cash and disappear.

IN THE STREET. When out at a bar or in the street, don’t pull your wallet out to pay someone $2 and flash how much money you have in said wallet.  Someone could snatch it, or rob you later when you are on your way out of the establishment.

ATMs. Don’t take money out of ATMs unless they are in front of or inside a bank that you know has cameras.  Some random ATM’s will deduct from your account and then not give you the cash (it’s happened to me!) or someone will line up behind you and instead of taking money out they’ll insert a machine to clone the details of the card of the previous customer which was you! (it’s happened to a friend.)

WATCH YOUR BILLS. Don’t accept $50 or $100 bills as change from random people, they could be fake. Be especially careful with the change you get from taxi drivers and be sure the bills aren’t ripped or taped or you will have a problem spending them later.

YOUR WALLET. Don’t put your wallet in the outer pocket of a backpack or your back pocket then get on a crowded bus, it will get snatched. Don’t use money pouches that hang around your neck, also an easy target.

BEGGERS. If a begger gets unusually close to you it’s because he’s about to rob you.  It’s happened to several people I know.  Only give beggers what you have in your pocket, don’t pull out your wallet.

PUBLIC TRANSPORT. Don’t get into public transport like taxis or buses with only $20 bills or larger, getting your change later could be VERY difficult.

CHECKS. Should be obvious, but don’t accept checks from anyone. And don’t bring traveler’s or your checks, will be very hard to cash here. You better to have some verifed account, similar to Fifth Third student checking accounts.

GETTING CHANGE. Banks in Ecuador will not give you change for larger bills if you don’t have an account there. Best place I’ve found to get change is from the big grocery store chains like Supermaxi.

HOUSEWORK. Don’t allow random workers into your house to do random jobs, try to get locally recommended people or use the same ones always, they could be casing your place for later.

SLEEPING AROUND. When sleeping with random people you don’t know that well, mind your valuables well, let’s just say a friend told me!

OK, now you are thinking like an Ecuadorian a little bit!

Don’t let this off-put you, having an Ecuadorian common sense is enough to thwart 99.9% of thieves in Ecuador.

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Why buying 1 block off the ocean is a fool’s play in Ecuador

Most beachfront towns in Ecuador are tabletop flat for a few blocks, then have hills behind.

If you buy right on the beach (or on the hills behind the town) you will get a constant, amazing breeze that will keep you cool and keep the bugs away.

But in most of these seaside towns, some expats try to save by buying a block or two back off the ocean. Because it’s still DIRT cheap.

But I wouldn’t live there even if you paid me. You don’t get the ocean breeze and it’s hot, muggy and buggy too! Also, not an easy resale.

So if you’re going to buy on the coast of Ecuador, make sure it’s beachfront or on the hills with an oceanview!

Don’t settle for anything less!

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